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The squeeze and poke

Did Justin Bieber try and give me the squeeze and poke?


Did you watch “The View” yesterday???? It was horrible. The entire show was about getting pregnant. Did you know that when you turn 30 years old you have only 10% of your eggs left in your baby maker? I turn 30 on May 7th. I’m about to lose 90% of my eggs.

How depressing. It makes me feel like I REALLY need to try and have a baby the next two years or it may never happen. Two years ago my doctor told me if I ever wanted to have kids I would have to gain 10-15 pounds. It was a very hard thing for me to hear to be honest. Since then I have really focused on getting a little muscle and body fat up on this piece. Because of my doctor scaring the crap out of me I gained 10 pounds.

Did anyone else watch “The View” and see this? Would I sound like a big fat baby if I told you I cried. Well bitches….I did. Ms. Walters and her gang of biznatches made me cry.

So the question of the day is…..WHO WANTS TO HAVE MY BABY?

To every human, the killer whale story is a tale of a wild animal gone nuts. But to the killer whale it was just the day his boss pushed him a bit too far.

Zilla sure is a lazy lady. And yes, I’m going to post like a zillion pictures of Zilla. Probably everyday.

The rumors are true! One of my favorite trainwreck celebrities WILL be on Dancing with the Stars next season!!! It’s like Christmas!

Pamela Anderson, will be on next season’s Dancing With The Stars!

DWTS’ Maksim Chmerkovskiy confirmed the news to In Touch Weekly on Tuesday night, telling reporters, “They did an amazing job keeping everything a secret this time, but we know that Pam is on.”

I hope Pam buys a very supportive sportsbra. FO REALS!

Who else should be on this next season?

Oh and PS. I heard a rumor that Mel B. aka Scary Spice may take over for Samantha Harris as Tom’s co-host. I’m not sure how I feel about that.


I’m pretty sure I have talked about this before. Meatloaf FREAKS ME OUT! It always has. When I was 12 my Mom made meatloaf and I was hardcore bitching that the meatloaf freaks me out and that I didn’t want to eat it. She tells me to shut up and eat it. I keep bitching so my mom decides to play “Let’s make a Deal”. Mom say’s that I don’t have to eat my meatloaf AND I can have an ice cream sandwich IF……I eat a bite of cat food. Btw- Minnie my cat was on the wet food.

Now, I realize cat food is flippin gross. But to make a point about how much I didn’t like meatloaf….I DID IT! I ate the wet cat food then enjoyed a big ice cream sammy.

Now let’s flash forward to 2-22-2010. I made meatloaf for my fella for dinner. I didn’t have any. DUH! But, I made it for him because it’s his most favorite of meals.

Now flash forward to lunch time 2-23-2010. I’m hungry and don’t know what I want for lunch. The night before my fella was going on and on about how yummy my meatloaf was and how it was like….the best he ever had (yes I’m bragging). I’m thinking to myself, how good could it be? So guess what, I ate some. Just a little taste. I couldn’t believe it. MEATLOAF! Someone call my mother. Guess what else? I FLIPPIN LOVED IT! I continued to eat 3 big ass hunks of it like they were taking me to the chair.

The moral of the story: don’t say you hate something till you try it!

If you’re not bleeding, vomiting, or on fire, chill out and stop crying.


Be great today! I don’t love you…..I’m IN LOVE with you!

Britney is back yall! Look at her hot smokin body. I was waiting for hot Brit Brit to come back and BAMMMMMMM! It’s rumored that she has a new album coming out in June. I’m excited and I don’t care who knows it!

Question of the day….

Are you a DOUCHE if you drive a Yellow car? Yellow mustang, the SWEET yellow Hummer? I think you get the idea.

Question of the day: are you a DOUCHEBAG if you drive a yellow car??? PS. my vote is YES. DUH!